How to get your family on board with breastfeeding
Having support from your family will help you breastfeed, bond with your baby, and meet your breastfeeding goals. But your family may not know exactly how to help or they may not be supportive of you breastfeeding. People closest to you should know how to help you as a new mom. Here are a few suggestions on what to say.
Dealing with lack of family support
Moms share how they handled negative or unhelpful comments about breastfeeding. “This is a decision I’ve made, and you don’t have to agree with the decision, you just have to respect it.”
Give your partner top duties.
After your child is born, a great way for your partner to be supportive of your breastfeeding efforts is by being there for you. Having a partner or spouse who understands that you need to breastfeed on demand can make all the difference.
- When you’re at home, your partner’s role could be to bring the baby to you at night for a feeding or change your baby’s diaper after a feeding, both of which can help him or her bond with the baby. Your partner can also bring you water or snacks, since staying hydrated and eating healthy will help you continue breastfeeding.
- If you can, take a birthing, breastfeeding, and/or new parenting class together, either through the hospital, the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) program, or other organizations.
- The more your partner understands about the benefits of breastfeeding, the more likely he or she will be able to support you and participate in the experience.
Educate your family early.
Many new moms (and dads, grandparents, and close friends) are surprised at how often newborns need to eat. This is because a newborn’s tummy is tiny. It won’t always be like this, but at first your baby will probably want to breastfeed a lot. When you know what to expect, it’s easier to handle. This will also help you teach your loved ones about how to support you, which is very important to do early on.
Regardless of how they express their love or concern, your family wants the best for you. The better they understand the mom-baby connection that comes with breastfeeding, the more supportive they can be. Let your loved ones know that it’s impossible to “spoil” a newborn. Being close to mom is a baby’s way of staying safe and feeling secure.
Identify your inner circle.
A breastfeeding mom needs a support network. Finding a breastfeeding support group and turning to family members and friends who support your decision to breastfeed will help you continue when challenges arise. You can also find a local La Leche League International or talk with a WIC peer counselor.
Also, ask the health educator at the hospital you deliver in to provide information for local support groups, mom groups, and more. Share breastfeeding information, videos, and pamphlets with your support team so they can understand and respect your breastfeeding goals.
Have older kids pitch in.
Whether you already have older children or pre-schoolers at home, kids are usually curious about the new baby. There is nothing inappropriate about breastfeeding in front of older children, so long as you feel comfortable with it. If they ask what you're doing, you can tell them you're feeding the baby so he or she grows healthy and strong. If the child is old enough to follow directions, maybe his or her job could be to get you a glass of water when you breastfeed or grab you a snack from the kitchen.
Everyone has an opinion.
Every family is different. And you know your family best. Educate those you are closest to and include them early on so they can see how you and your baby are learning and bonding through breastfeeding. If you don’t feel comfortable breastfeeding in front of certain family members, you may want to delay those visits until you feel more confident with breastfeeding.